Merry Christmas everyone, and welcome to the 20th post! Thank you all for reading it, and thank you all for making me so happy.
Now, as a popular song says in the lyrics:
"My heart's a stereo
It beats for you, so listen close
Hear my thoughts in every no-oh-ote
Make me your radio
And turn me up when you feel low
This melody was meant for you
Just sing along to my stereo."
I only take that section of the song, because those are some of the only words in that song that make a meaningful impact in my life. I kind of interpret it as saying, "My feelings are openly expressed. They're said to you, so please listen close. Hear my thoughts in every word. Make me your backup. You can talk to me when you're down. All I say was meant for you. Just feel the same as I do too."
Yeah, something along those lines. But yeah, that song kept playing today of all days, and no matter which of my stations I turned it to, that song would pop up!
Maybe it's because I'm not single anymore? Maybe it's because it's just a great song? Or maybe it's just a coincidence? Ha, I don't believe in coincidences though. Everything happens for a reason. Some people don't believe that, but it's true.
God has a purpose behind all the things that happen in the world. Now, don't get mad at him, or anything. It's all part of his plan to get us to live with him again.
Ha, anyways... Yeah, I'm betting some of you are noticing that I said I'm not single anymore, and questioning it. Yes, it's true. I have a girlfriend now. She's a 14-year old named Taylor. Me and her have actually kind of liked each other for a while now. There was a football game a couple months back, and we both went, by chance. She didn't have a blanket, and it was freezing that night. I was really warm, and opened my arms to take off the blanket. Instantly, she hugged me, and was all like, "OH MY GOSH, YOU'RE SO WARM!".
Ha, well yes, I was ridiculously warm, and so as not to be rude, I kept snuggling in that blanket with her for pretty much the whole game. It was at this point that I realized that me and Taylor probably looked like we were dating. Again, I realized that I didn't much care what people thought, so I kept on hugging her. I kept thinking to myself, me and her could kiss right now, and I wouldn't mind. We never did kiss, but that thought has stayed with me for all this time.
So yeah, that's just a little background to how it happened.
Song-of-the-Day: Stereo Hearts by Gym Class Heroes (feat. Adam Levine): Well, I'd hope it makes sense WHY I chose this song. It keeps playing, in my head, in real life, and just everywhere. Ha, I just really like this song.
Shout-Out(s)-of-the-Day: Katie Salvo, Taylor Sorg, Chelsea Moore:
Katie: I'm glad to have someone so brilliant as you in my life. You are one of the most important people in my life, and I don't know where I would be today if I didn't have you to talk to.
Thanks for being true to who you are, and not faking yourself for people's pleasure. Have a wonderful Christmas day!
Taylor: Thank you for thinking of that day, today. Thank you for asking me if I wouldn't mind maybe starting something with you. I'm very happy to be your boyfriend, and happy to call you my girlfriend. (:
I hope you have a wonderful rest of your Christmas, and that you can Christ there with you, throughout your trials. <3 I love you.
Chelsea: I hope you know how much I really care about our friendship. We agree on so much, and yet we fight about some things. You're a lot smarter than people give you credit for. You understand a lot more than I did when I was your age, two years ago. Stay strong, my dear, and keep calm.
Have a wonderful Christmas. (:
Especially for today. HAVE A WONDERFUL CHRISTMAS, AND HAVE A NICE DAY!
Monday, December 24, 2012
Sunday, December 23, 2012
Is It Too Late to Apologize?
Welcome everyone. First off, sorry that I haven't posted in a few days. I needed some time to myself, so I wouldn't sit here and blow off my steam on you guys. I spent these past few days getting to know myself better, learning some things about control and understanding, and simply trying to get over my issues. I've turned myself more towards the Lord, and towards Christ, in these times of trial. Insomuch, that I feel the spirit in my house, no matter what I'm doing.
My sister left for her mission Wednesday, and I'm still trying to get used to it. I continue to glance at the door, or glance towards the couch where she would sleep. Of course I know she'll not be there for another year and a half, at least, but I can't help looking, just in case I was dreaming the whole time. Just in case it might have been a big joke to make me miss her. I guess I'm just having a hard time adjusting to the sudden emptiness in my house.
So, as some people may already know, I'm letting go. Not even kidding anymore. I'm completely and utterly letting go of all that I thought would keep me happy forever. Thanks to recent enlightenment by friends, I realize I'm a major idiot, a major screw-up, and just plain stupid sometimes. I went through a day of depression, and that's what ate up one of these past few days of blank nothing. But after that day, thanks to some of the best friends I have, whom shall be named in a minute, I got up "off the ground", so to speak. They introduced me to a couple of new groups, like Mayday Parade and He Is We. I actually REALLY like those groups! And my wonderful friends are Autumn Jephson and Miranda Dahl. Ha, even though Autumn didn't show me any music, she always talks to me and makes me laugh at random stupid stuff in every day life. Miranda showed me all that music, so she claims the most praise out of the two, I suppose.
Ha, I love just trying to make Randa laugh and smile at random stuff. It's like, the other day, we had an hour of lunch. And I had nothing to do, so I went to the auditorium(which is officially locked to everyone not in Troyplairs). I knocked on the door, and just as I did so, Jori and Jarrod walked up. Jori said that on behalf of the council I was invited to have lunch with them. SO I GET IN! *insert Freddie Mercury meme* Anyways, so Randa was out in her car and craving some hot chocolate. They usually sell hot chocolate during lunch, so as soon as I saw that on Facebook, I told Jori to comment that I was on my way. Jori lent me a dollar, because I didn't have one.
I run out of the auditorium expecting to buy it, and what do you know, THE STORE IS CLOSED. I was like, "Gosh dang it". So I walk back in the auditorium and tell Jori the news so she could tell Miranda. Randa was all bummed and stuff, but she understood. xD Oh how I love the things I do at that school.
So... I learned a lot of things over the course of the past few days. Most of which are a bit personal, and invoke this sudden feeling in people to make me feel special. Because I felt like a complete loser, BUT I'm over that now.
Songs-of-the-Day: OneRepublic Medley by KurtHugoSchneider Most people probably don't know about this song collage. It's just one guy singing several songs by OneRepublic in one sitting. He's actually very good, and I absolutely love the way he did his rendition of each song.
Shout-Out(s)-of-the-Day: Miranda Lyn Dahl, and Autumn Jephson.
Miranda: Ha, you know I really appreciate everything that you do for me. We talk so much nowadays, it's like, not even funny anymore. We have our Q&A sessions, and learn a lot of random stuff about each other. We talk about personal crap with each other. Nothing TOO personal, but stuff that we wouldn't tell everyone else. I think you know me best out of most of my other friends right now. Thank you for introducing me to He Is We and Mayday Parade. Their music really saves my life, as it did yours. I can't even express my full thanks in just words. I owe you more than just one. xD
Autumn: Ha, you're awesome Autumn. You're beautiful, and you don't even care to notice most of the time. We're both just single people, and somewhat stranger than the average person on our bus. Ha, you already know how I feel... and you know how hard it is for me to act upon what I feel, for fear of ruining it all.
Think about what I asked you. (: I wasn't even kidding. I was totally serious.
So, as always, HAVE A NICE DAY!
My sister left for her mission Wednesday, and I'm still trying to get used to it. I continue to glance at the door, or glance towards the couch where she would sleep. Of course I know she'll not be there for another year and a half, at least, but I can't help looking, just in case I was dreaming the whole time. Just in case it might have been a big joke to make me miss her. I guess I'm just having a hard time adjusting to the sudden emptiness in my house.
So, as some people may already know, I'm letting go. Not even kidding anymore. I'm completely and utterly letting go of all that I thought would keep me happy forever. Thanks to recent enlightenment by friends, I realize I'm a major idiot, a major screw-up, and just plain stupid sometimes. I went through a day of depression, and that's what ate up one of these past few days of blank nothing. But after that day, thanks to some of the best friends I have, whom shall be named in a minute, I got up "off the ground", so to speak. They introduced me to a couple of new groups, like Mayday Parade and He Is We. I actually REALLY like those groups! And my wonderful friends are Autumn Jephson and Miranda Dahl. Ha, even though Autumn didn't show me any music, she always talks to me and makes me laugh at random stupid stuff in every day life. Miranda showed me all that music, so she claims the most praise out of the two, I suppose.
Ha, I love just trying to make Randa laugh and smile at random stuff. It's like, the other day, we had an hour of lunch. And I had nothing to do, so I went to the auditorium(which is officially locked to everyone not in Troyplairs). I knocked on the door, and just as I did so, Jori and Jarrod walked up. Jori said that on behalf of the council I was invited to have lunch with them. SO I GET IN! *insert Freddie Mercury meme* Anyways, so Randa was out in her car and craving some hot chocolate. They usually sell hot chocolate during lunch, so as soon as I saw that on Facebook, I told Jori to comment that I was on my way. Jori lent me a dollar, because I didn't have one.
I run out of the auditorium expecting to buy it, and what do you know, THE STORE IS CLOSED. I was like, "Gosh dang it". So I walk back in the auditorium and tell Jori the news so she could tell Miranda. Randa was all bummed and stuff, but she understood. xD Oh how I love the things I do at that school.
So... I learned a lot of things over the course of the past few days. Most of which are a bit personal, and invoke this sudden feeling in people to make me feel special. Because I felt like a complete loser, BUT I'm over that now.
Songs-of-the-Day: OneRepublic Medley by KurtHugoSchneider Most people probably don't know about this song collage. It's just one guy singing several songs by OneRepublic in one sitting. He's actually very good, and I absolutely love the way he did his rendition of each song.
Shout-Out(s)-of-the-Day: Miranda Lyn Dahl, and Autumn Jephson.
Miranda: Ha, you know I really appreciate everything that you do for me. We talk so much nowadays, it's like, not even funny anymore. We have our Q&A sessions, and learn a lot of random stuff about each other. We talk about personal crap with each other. Nothing TOO personal, but stuff that we wouldn't tell everyone else. I think you know me best out of most of my other friends right now. Thank you for introducing me to He Is We and Mayday Parade. Their music really saves my life, as it did yours. I can't even express my full thanks in just words. I owe you more than just one. xD
Autumn: Ha, you're awesome Autumn. You're beautiful, and you don't even care to notice most of the time. We're both just single people, and somewhat stranger than the average person on our bus. Ha, you already know how I feel... and you know how hard it is for me to act upon what I feel, for fear of ruining it all.
Think about what I asked you. (: I wasn't even kidding. I was totally serious.
So, as always, HAVE A NICE DAY!
Friday, December 14, 2012
End of the Week
Well, it's yet another wonderful Friday! Ha, I hope everyone is having a wonderful day! I know I did! ;D
Ha, such a great Friday. I was in my tuxedo all day, and it felt okay. It gave me some grief during lunch, because we had over an hour of lunch! Ha, I just held Kat's hand all throughout the assembly today, and all throughout lunch pretty much. I'm kind of worried about her. For the past week or two, she's been slowly getting this sort of arthritis-based nodule on her ring-finger on both her hands.
It was wonderful, we had a small kiss when I dropped her off at her 4th Hour. After that, I went to my Biology class. We went to the English lab, which is on the OPPOSITE side of the school, compared to the normal classroom.
So when class was over, I walked up behind her, and gave her this big hug from behind. (: She was so surprised and nearly fell over. I caught her, and then we hugged for a minute there. Again, she decides she's going to take me home, so I agree, because I had to. So we held hands the whole time she drove me again. As we get to my house, I notice that I'm home alone again. I didn't mention anything, because that could've led to some seriously bad stuff. We say goodbye, and have another one of those repeated triple-kisses. (: Oh my goodness, for some reason those kinds of kisses feel so... good. They're just, so epic, it's ridiculous. (:
Love you, Kitty. Thanks for starting this with me again, you have no idea how happy I am now because of it.
Song-of-the-Day: Wanted by Hunter Hayes: I don't why I keep listening to this song. FIRST OFF, I'm not the biggest country fan, as of yet. I think it may be growing on me, after all this time. Ha, maybe because I was singing this song when me and Kat kissed the triple-kiss for the first time. Maybe that memory is just stuck in my memory. Ha, yeah, that makes sense.
Shout-out-of-the-Day:Rebekah Phillips: Thank you so much for being the supportive best friend I've always wanted, needed, loved, etc.. You get my point. You're so amazing, and I'm glad that Dawson has someone so perfect as you in his life. "Wherever we grow, we grow together. Spiritually, emotionally, physically, whichever way.
AND AS ALWAYS, HAVE NICE DAY!
Ha, such a great Friday. I was in my tuxedo all day, and it felt okay. It gave me some grief during lunch, because we had over an hour of lunch! Ha, I just held Kat's hand all throughout the assembly today, and all throughout lunch pretty much. I'm kind of worried about her. For the past week or two, she's been slowly getting this sort of arthritis-based nodule on her ring-finger on both her hands.
It was wonderful, we had a small kiss when I dropped her off at her 4th Hour. After that, I went to my Biology class. We went to the English lab, which is on the OPPOSITE side of the school, compared to the normal classroom.
So when class was over, I walked up behind her, and gave her this big hug from behind. (: She was so surprised and nearly fell over. I caught her, and then we hugged for a minute there. Again, she decides she's going to take me home, so I agree, because I had to. So we held hands the whole time she drove me again. As we get to my house, I notice that I'm home alone again. I didn't mention anything, because that could've led to some seriously bad stuff. We say goodbye, and have another one of those repeated triple-kisses. (: Oh my goodness, for some reason those kinds of kisses feel so... good. They're just, so epic, it's ridiculous. (:
Love you, Kitty. Thanks for starting this with me again, you have no idea how happy I am now because of it.
Song-of-the-Day: Wanted by Hunter Hayes: I don't why I keep listening to this song. FIRST OFF, I'm not the biggest country fan, as of yet. I think it may be growing on me, after all this time. Ha, maybe because I was singing this song when me and Kat kissed the triple-kiss for the first time. Maybe that memory is just stuck in my memory. Ha, yeah, that makes sense.
Shout-out-of-the-Day:Rebekah Phillips: Thank you so much for being the supportive best friend I've always wanted, needed, loved, etc.. You get my point. You're so amazing, and I'm glad that Dawson has someone so perfect as you in his life. "Wherever we grow, we grow together. Spiritually, emotionally, physically, whichever way.
AND AS ALWAYS, HAVE NICE DAY!
Thursday, December 13, 2012
Best Day IN School
Oh my goodness! Welcome back everyone!
Today has been absolutely wonderful! One of the best days I've had inside of school, and another bonus, I'm EXTREMELY tired. Even with all the stress and tiredness I was having because of the choir performances we've had this past week. I've had SIX(eight if you count all performances at Salt Lake) performances in the past week, and it's absolutely ridiculous.
Performances:1: December 6th, 2012 - As the Troylairs we sang for the Broulim's Christmas Party, and I think we actually did rather nice. A little pitch problems on specific sections of Twas The Night Before Christmas, our longest song. It's 32 pages long!
2, 3, and 4: December 7th, 2012 - As the Troylairs group once again, we headed off to Salt Lake City to sing in the prestigious Temple Square. First we sang at The Church Office Building, then The Joseph Smith Memorial Building, and then finally at the end of the day we sang at The Assembly Hall(or as Alex calls it, the Jewish Building).
5: December 8th, 2012 - (finally a solo moment) I had Mr. RHS, which is basically the equivalent of a beauty pageant for guys. We had Mr. RHS, Mr. Fitness, Mr. Sensitivity, etc.. That night, I won the Mr. Sweetheart award, which I was quite surprised I even won anything.
6: December 9th, 2012 - In my stake, we had a Stake Conference, and I am part of the Stake Choir. We sang a few songs for the meeting, and that was really stressing me out.
7: December 12th, 2012 - Again, as the Troylairs group, we had our official Christmas concert for all to come and see. I think we did a lot better last night, than we did at a couple of our Salt Lake performances.
And last but not least, 8: It may not have been the most important performance, but we were asked to sing in front of the School District Officials. I arrived a little late, due to unknown circumstances.
Ha, yeah, all those performances were starting to really stress me out.
But anyways, onto the title's purpose. Today was just absolutely wonderful! So, as some of you may know, I've been starting to hang out with Catherine, or Katherine as some of us know her by. I walk with her during lunch, take care of her whenever she starts to have a diabetic crash, and carry her bags. It started a couple of days ago, but me and her starting holding hands in the hall while we walked. At first, I thought it was just her doing it because it felt natural to her. But then after school, I was walking her out of Women's Chorus and we headed for her locker. She then is like, "Well, I would tell you to go to the bus, but I'm taking you home! I'm not taking no for an answer!" Ha, so I really didn't think much of it. As we get in the car and start driving, we start holding hands and again I think nothing of it. But as we get to my house, we sit in the car for a minute, and as I'm getting out, she makes a bit of a sound like, "Hmm." I turn around to ask if she said anything, and all I saw was her waving me toward her. So, I leaned in, we put our heads together, turned our heads, and then kissed once. I then give her a bit of a strange hug, and then we just wave goodbye.
And then for the District performance, I called and asked if she wanted to take me and watch us sing. SO, she comes to my house, picks me up, and we go. After the performance was over, she gave me a big hug, and we had a small kiss there too.
As we arrive at my house, after the performance, I'm just sitting in the car, and guess what song comes on the radio? Wanted by Hunter Hayes. Uh-huh! And so I started singing it, and I glanced over at her, and she was smiling pretty big. I started to lean in, and we kissed again, and again, and again. NO, IT WAS NOT MAKING OUT. There was NO tongue involved. It was like three kisses right after each other.
I give her a big hug, then get out of the car and walk up to my door slowly. I glance back, and we wave again.
Yep, that pretty much made my entire day, week, high school year, whatever! It was just so many sparks flying in that car.
Song-of-the-Day: Wanted by Hunter Hayes: You can probably guess why. xD
Shout-Out-of-the-Day: Miranda Lyn Dahl: Ha, you're amazing, Randa dear. Thanks for starting our new hand shake, and always smiling and waving at me when we pass each other in the hall. I appreciate it.
SO AS ALWAYS, HAVE A NICE DAY!
Today has been absolutely wonderful! One of the best days I've had inside of school, and another bonus, I'm EXTREMELY tired. Even with all the stress and tiredness I was having because of the choir performances we've had this past week. I've had SIX(eight if you count all performances at Salt Lake) performances in the past week, and it's absolutely ridiculous.
Performances:1: December 6th, 2012 - As the Troylairs we sang for the Broulim's Christmas Party, and I think we actually did rather nice. A little pitch problems on specific sections of Twas The Night Before Christmas, our longest song. It's 32 pages long!
2, 3, and 4: December 7th, 2012 - As the Troylairs group once again, we headed off to Salt Lake City to sing in the prestigious Temple Square. First we sang at The Church Office Building, then The Joseph Smith Memorial Building, and then finally at the end of the day we sang at The Assembly Hall(or as Alex calls it, the Jewish Building).
5: December 8th, 2012 - (finally a solo moment) I had Mr. RHS, which is basically the equivalent of a beauty pageant for guys. We had Mr. RHS, Mr. Fitness, Mr. Sensitivity, etc.. That night, I won the Mr. Sweetheart award, which I was quite surprised I even won anything.
6: December 9th, 2012 - In my stake, we had a Stake Conference, and I am part of the Stake Choir. We sang a few songs for the meeting, and that was really stressing me out.
7: December 12th, 2012 - Again, as the Troylairs group, we had our official Christmas concert for all to come and see. I think we did a lot better last night, than we did at a couple of our Salt Lake performances.
And last but not least, 8: It may not have been the most important performance, but we were asked to sing in front of the School District Officials. I arrived a little late, due to unknown circumstances.
Ha, yeah, all those performances were starting to really stress me out.
But anyways, onto the title's purpose. Today was just absolutely wonderful! So, as some of you may know, I've been starting to hang out with Catherine, or Katherine as some of us know her by. I walk with her during lunch, take care of her whenever she starts to have a diabetic crash, and carry her bags. It started a couple of days ago, but me and her starting holding hands in the hall while we walked. At first, I thought it was just her doing it because it felt natural to her. But then after school, I was walking her out of Women's Chorus and we headed for her locker. She then is like, "Well, I would tell you to go to the bus, but I'm taking you home! I'm not taking no for an answer!" Ha, so I really didn't think much of it. As we get in the car and start driving, we start holding hands and again I think nothing of it. But as we get to my house, we sit in the car for a minute, and as I'm getting out, she makes a bit of a sound like, "Hmm." I turn around to ask if she said anything, and all I saw was her waving me toward her. So, I leaned in, we put our heads together, turned our heads, and then kissed once. I then give her a bit of a strange hug, and then we just wave goodbye.
And then for the District performance, I called and asked if she wanted to take me and watch us sing. SO, she comes to my house, picks me up, and we go. After the performance was over, she gave me a big hug, and we had a small kiss there too.
As we arrive at my house, after the performance, I'm just sitting in the car, and guess what song comes on the radio? Wanted by Hunter Hayes. Uh-huh! And so I started singing it, and I glanced over at her, and she was smiling pretty big. I started to lean in, and we kissed again, and again, and again. NO, IT WAS NOT MAKING OUT. There was NO tongue involved. It was like three kisses right after each other.
I give her a big hug, then get out of the car and walk up to my door slowly. I glance back, and we wave again.
Yep, that pretty much made my entire day, week, high school year, whatever! It was just so many sparks flying in that car.
Song-of-the-Day: Wanted by Hunter Hayes: You can probably guess why. xD
Shout-Out-of-the-Day: Miranda Lyn Dahl: Ha, you're amazing, Randa dear. Thanks for starting our new hand shake, and always smiling and waving at me when we pass each other in the hall. I appreciate it.
SO AS ALWAYS, HAVE A NICE DAY!
Tuesday, December 11, 2012
First Time at a Theater in FOREVER
Good evening, readers! It's yet another week, to start off! The final full week before my sister leaves for at least a year and a half. I'm so proud of her, and I'm sad that I don't say that enough.
She leaves on Wednesday, the 19th, of next week. I'm so grateful for the time we have left.
So, last night, she took me to see the movie, Pitch Perfect. OH MY GOSH, this movie is amazing. I dare not say anymore, for the fear of revealing something crucial.
It was just, so amazing. It's my new favorite movie! Such great skills they use in their singing...
ANYWAYS! I'm going to cut it a bit short, because I have a concert on Wednesday for Choir! I need to rest my voice, because I've been coughing really bad lately.
Songs-of-the-Day: Titanium(David Guetta), Just the Way You Are(Bruno Mars), Locked Out Of Heaven(Bruno Mars), Beauty and a Beat(Justin Bieber), The Scientist(Coldplay).
Titanium: This song has been on my mind CONSTANTLY for the past 7 months and 10 days, approximately, due to circumstances.
JtWYA: One of those love songs I'll sing to Rebekah whenever I feel like it, I guess. She's perfect to me, no matter what state she's in.
LOoH: Sometimes, this is how I feel. Like I'm locked out of what I feel is my eternal obligation. What I feel is my version of heaven. I miss those days, where I would feel warm, safe, and secure when I was around her. Come back to me again, soon, please? I'm dying without your security...
BaaB: Seems like an interesting choice, perhaps? I don't hate the Biebs, unlike much of the male population. I may not enjoy all of his music, but that's only because it's not always my style of music! He's an okay guy, and I can respect him, personally.
The Scientist: I've always loved Coldplay, and this song keeps clogging up my Spotify suggestions. (:
Shout-Out(s)-of-The-Day: Rebekah Phillips, Chelsea Moon, Katherine French
Rebekah P.: I love you, dear. I always will! You're always on my mind, and I hope you're having some of the greatest experiences you can at your last year of the Junior High. So much has been left unsaid, due to the aca-awkwardness I could impose by saying it. You know how I feel, and you know I trust you with basically everything. The only thing I need to know, is if I should keep hoping, or if I should give up? Should I believe that I can once again be your one and only, or should I let that hope die? Should I just let this love, somehow go dormant? For wherever thou goest, I goest with thee. Unless thy will, is to journey accompanied by someone else.
As I have said before, I am forever yours. I'm your werewolf knight in vigil, as I wait for thee.
Chelsea: Well, we may not be that close of friends. But I can still rely on you when it comes to some of my personal dealings. Like, on the bus, when I came to you and talked about my whole situation with why I was crying. You understood me, and did your best to make me feel better about it all. Thanks for that, dear.
Katherine, Frenchie Fry: Ha, I still remember when I used to call you that all that time. Thank you so much for always being nice to me, and always relying on me for moral support. I'm always here for you too, Fry. Thanks for being my warming support during this school year. I really need it, and you really are one of the best friends I've had in a while. Thanks to you, I got to become better friends with Alex. When I first met him, I mentioned you and I were friends and he actually told me, "Oh dude, you're like my best friend now! I love Kat, she's like my best friend, dude." Ha, you're a great person to be around, most days.
Love you, Kitty.
AND AS ALWAYS, HAVE NICE DAY!
She leaves on Wednesday, the 19th, of next week. I'm so grateful for the time we have left.
So, last night, she took me to see the movie, Pitch Perfect. OH MY GOSH, this movie is amazing. I dare not say anymore, for the fear of revealing something crucial.
It was just, so amazing. It's my new favorite movie! Such great skills they use in their singing...
ANYWAYS! I'm going to cut it a bit short, because I have a concert on Wednesday for Choir! I need to rest my voice, because I've been coughing really bad lately.
Songs-of-the-Day: Titanium(David Guetta), Just the Way You Are(Bruno Mars), Locked Out Of Heaven(Bruno Mars), Beauty and a Beat(Justin Bieber), The Scientist(Coldplay).
Titanium: This song has been on my mind CONSTANTLY for the past 7 months and 10 days, approximately, due to circumstances.
JtWYA: One of those love songs I'll sing to Rebekah whenever I feel like it, I guess. She's perfect to me, no matter what state she's in.
LOoH: Sometimes, this is how I feel. Like I'm locked out of what I feel is my eternal obligation. What I feel is my version of heaven. I miss those days, where I would feel warm, safe, and secure when I was around her. Come back to me again, soon, please? I'm dying without your security...
BaaB: Seems like an interesting choice, perhaps? I don't hate the Biebs, unlike much of the male population. I may not enjoy all of his music, but that's only because it's not always my style of music! He's an okay guy, and I can respect him, personally.
The Scientist: I've always loved Coldplay, and this song keeps clogging up my Spotify suggestions. (:
Shout-Out(s)-of-The-Day: Rebekah Phillips, Chelsea Moon, Katherine French
Rebekah P.: I love you, dear. I always will! You're always on my mind, and I hope you're having some of the greatest experiences you can at your last year of the Junior High. So much has been left unsaid, due to the aca-awkwardness I could impose by saying it. You know how I feel, and you know I trust you with basically everything. The only thing I need to know, is if I should keep hoping, or if I should give up? Should I believe that I can once again be your one and only, or should I let that hope die? Should I just let this love, somehow go dormant? For wherever thou goest, I goest with thee. Unless thy will, is to journey accompanied by someone else.
As I have said before, I am forever yours. I'm your werewolf knight in vigil, as I wait for thee.
Chelsea: Well, we may not be that close of friends. But I can still rely on you when it comes to some of my personal dealings. Like, on the bus, when I came to you and talked about my whole situation with why I was crying. You understood me, and did your best to make me feel better about it all. Thanks for that, dear.
Katherine, Frenchie Fry: Ha, I still remember when I used to call you that all that time. Thank you so much for always being nice to me, and always relying on me for moral support. I'm always here for you too, Fry. Thanks for being my warming support during this school year. I really need it, and you really are one of the best friends I've had in a while. Thanks to you, I got to become better friends with Alex. When I first met him, I mentioned you and I were friends and he actually told me, "Oh dude, you're like my best friend now! I love Kat, she's like my best friend, dude." Ha, you're a great person to be around, most days.
Love you, Kitty.
AND AS ALWAYS, HAVE NICE DAY!
Saturday, December 8, 2012
The Salt Lake Trip
Hello again, everyone. (warning: This will seem a little bit boring, and different today) I apologize now, because we got home at 12:25 and I didn't sleep till like 1:30 A.M..
So yesterday, as the Troylairs, we all went to Salt Lake and sang.
It was a lot of fun, actually. It was my first trip with the Choirs actually. It was an extremely great experience for many of us. We performed 3 times. Once at the Church Office Building, then at the Joseph Smith Memorial Building, and then finally at the Assembly Hall. We performed at the Church Office Building, I think around 1:00 or 1:30ish. I wasn't quite sure, because I didn't check the time. It went okay on some songs, but we weren't quite ready it seems.
Our second performance at the Joseph Smith Memorial Building went a lot better, but we were still a bit lacking in our preparedness. I think the only that could've been fixed was our energy. Some of us seemed a bit dead or something.
After that, we had about 4 hours to go and eat, see other groups perform, or just walk around Temple Square. First, I grouped up with my friends Alex, Naomi, Nick, Brian, Amber, and Grant. We headed over to the food court in the new mall, City Creek Mall. Man, that place is HUGE. It's really nice though, and I'm glad the Church decided to build it. It brings so much business to the Salt Lake area. Alex suggested that I go try out this Chinese place that was on the other end of the food court called Chang Chun. So, I did! Little did I know, this place is pretty much like Panda Express. You order either one entree or two and ask for either rice or chow mein noodles. It was actually really good for the price of about 6 dollars. And Alex was so nice! I didn't get a drink with my food, because the price wasn't worth the size of the cup I would've gotten. And he shared his cup with me. He was done with it, and he said I could use it and get a refill. Man, he's just such a nice guy. I mean, sure, we piss each other off sometimes, but we're like brothers. (:
And then I went to this place called Roxberry's, and got a smoothie. It made me laugh because it was called LOL Lime, and it basically consists of Raspberry Juice, Strawberries, Raspberries and Lime Sherbet.
Oh my goodness, it was DELICIOUS and healthy! :D
After that, we all went wandering around the area and decided to go to the Conference Center and get a tour. I've never been in there before, and oh my goodness that place is beautiful. I can't even put into words all the wonderful things we saw. It's just so wonderful, and such a wonderful place to feel the spirit in.
And then we all headed to the Assembly Hall because it was getting about time to start preparing to sing there and end the night. I have to admit our third and final performance was a lot better than our first two.
So, after that, we quickly shuffled out, and headed for the buses which were just around the corner. Ha, we were getting changed and Burrows walks on the bus saying, "You know we can see you guys changing outside, right?" Oh my gosh, I was like, CRAP. Ha, I instantly dropped down low, and then finished changing what I hadn't already. Thank goodness I hadn't changed anything embarrassing. After that, we had to bail out and sit outside for a while, so the girls could change.
After they changed and stuff, I shuffled back on the bus, and had to move my stuff since the bus ride back had a new rule, "No sitting next to someone of the opposite sex." I sat next to Alex on the way back, and Naomi and Amber sat behind us. There was an empty seat about 2 steps up and to the right. After a little while I left Alex with Naomi and went to sit in the empty seat. I picked up my iPod and popped in both ear buds. I didn't really want to be bothered at the time. After a while, I got bored of just Gangnam Style and Dubstep music, so I switched over to the playlist called J+R, because I was in that mood. It eventually got to the song Marry You by Bruno Mars. And then I started scrolling through my pictures and kept coming across pictures I have of Rebekah... and it became too much for me at that time. I slumped over and put my face in the seat and started to cry heavily. At this time, I didn't think anyone would care. Usually when I cry at school, or on school events, no one notices. But apparently my friend Alex saw it, and so told his girlfriend, Naomi to come and comfort me. I'm just sitting there, and all of a sudden I'm getting hugged by her. She was just being a comforting friend, and it really helped. Now I know why Alex decided to ask you out last night.
I just sat there for a little while, blubbering like an idiot... crying. And oh yeah, getting stared at by everyone in front of us who misunderstood it for a while. Thank you so much, Naomi. It really helped, and thank you so much Alex, for getting her over to me.
I just fell asleep after that, and tried not to have another episode. It's the first time that I've ever had one in public where people actually noticed and took action.
Song(s)-Of-The-Day:
Gangnam Style: This song has gone so viral, and it's ridiculous. I had Mr. RHS tonight and this is the song I did for my talent.
Shoutouts-Of-The-Day:Naomi Black: Thank you so much, dear, for being my emotional support during that time of hardship. I really appreciate the help with that. Your like my sister, and I love it. You and Alex deserve one another, you guys are so cute together.
Alexander Hammond: Alex, thank you so much for being another emotional support for me. Your my brother, and you really are genuine when you say you care. Thanks for the drink, thanks for the fun experience, and thank you for everything. I love you, bro.
So yesterday, as the Troylairs, we all went to Salt Lake and sang.
It was a lot of fun, actually. It was my first trip with the Choirs actually. It was an extremely great experience for many of us. We performed 3 times. Once at the Church Office Building, then at the Joseph Smith Memorial Building, and then finally at the Assembly Hall. We performed at the Church Office Building, I think around 1:00 or 1:30ish. I wasn't quite sure, because I didn't check the time. It went okay on some songs, but we weren't quite ready it seems.
Our second performance at the Joseph Smith Memorial Building went a lot better, but we were still a bit lacking in our preparedness. I think the only that could've been fixed was our energy. Some of us seemed a bit dead or something.
After that, we had about 4 hours to go and eat, see other groups perform, or just walk around Temple Square. First, I grouped up with my friends Alex, Naomi, Nick, Brian, Amber, and Grant. We headed over to the food court in the new mall, City Creek Mall. Man, that place is HUGE. It's really nice though, and I'm glad the Church decided to build it. It brings so much business to the Salt Lake area. Alex suggested that I go try out this Chinese place that was on the other end of the food court called Chang Chun. So, I did! Little did I know, this place is pretty much like Panda Express. You order either one entree or two and ask for either rice or chow mein noodles. It was actually really good for the price of about 6 dollars. And Alex was so nice! I didn't get a drink with my food, because the price wasn't worth the size of the cup I would've gotten. And he shared his cup with me. He was done with it, and he said I could use it and get a refill. Man, he's just such a nice guy. I mean, sure, we piss each other off sometimes, but we're like brothers. (:
And then I went to this place called Roxberry's, and got a smoothie. It made me laugh because it was called LOL Lime, and it basically consists of Raspberry Juice, Strawberries, Raspberries and Lime Sherbet.
Oh my goodness, it was DELICIOUS and healthy! :D
After that, we all went wandering around the area and decided to go to the Conference Center and get a tour. I've never been in there before, and oh my goodness that place is beautiful. I can't even put into words all the wonderful things we saw. It's just so wonderful, and such a wonderful place to feel the spirit in.
And then we all headed to the Assembly Hall because it was getting about time to start preparing to sing there and end the night. I have to admit our third and final performance was a lot better than our first two.
So, after that, we quickly shuffled out, and headed for the buses which were just around the corner. Ha, we were getting changed and Burrows walks on the bus saying, "You know we can see you guys changing outside, right?" Oh my gosh, I was like, CRAP. Ha, I instantly dropped down low, and then finished changing what I hadn't already. Thank goodness I hadn't changed anything embarrassing. After that, we had to bail out and sit outside for a while, so the girls could change.
After they changed and stuff, I shuffled back on the bus, and had to move my stuff since the bus ride back had a new rule, "No sitting next to someone of the opposite sex." I sat next to Alex on the way back, and Naomi and Amber sat behind us. There was an empty seat about 2 steps up and to the right. After a little while I left Alex with Naomi and went to sit in the empty seat. I picked up my iPod and popped in both ear buds. I didn't really want to be bothered at the time. After a while, I got bored of just Gangnam Style and Dubstep music, so I switched over to the playlist called J+R, because I was in that mood. It eventually got to the song Marry You by Bruno Mars. And then I started scrolling through my pictures and kept coming across pictures I have of Rebekah... and it became too much for me at that time. I slumped over and put my face in the seat and started to cry heavily. At this time, I didn't think anyone would care. Usually when I cry at school, or on school events, no one notices. But apparently my friend Alex saw it, and so told his girlfriend, Naomi to come and comfort me. I'm just sitting there, and all of a sudden I'm getting hugged by her. She was just being a comforting friend, and it really helped. Now I know why Alex decided to ask you out last night.
I just sat there for a little while, blubbering like an idiot... crying. And oh yeah, getting stared at by everyone in front of us who misunderstood it for a while. Thank you so much, Naomi. It really helped, and thank you so much Alex, for getting her over to me.
I just fell asleep after that, and tried not to have another episode. It's the first time that I've ever had one in public where people actually noticed and took action.
Song(s)-Of-The-Day:
Gangnam Style: This song has gone so viral, and it's ridiculous. I had Mr. RHS tonight and this is the song I did for my talent.
Shoutouts-Of-The-Day:Naomi Black: Thank you so much, dear, for being my emotional support during that time of hardship. I really appreciate the help with that. Your like my sister, and I love it. You and Alex deserve one another, you guys are so cute together.
Alexander Hammond: Alex, thank you so much for being another emotional support for me. Your my brother, and you really are genuine when you say you care. Thanks for the drink, thanks for the fun experience, and thank you for everything. I love you, bro.
Thursday, December 6, 2012
Fighting Off The Natural Impulses
Sorry, I really meant to do this on Monday, but let's just say that a lot has happened, and I'm not exactly sure how to say how I feel right now. I'll put it into simple words, I'm at my emotional peak, and going to break soon.
Monday: I got my new schedule for Second Trimester and I have to admit I like it.
1st Hour: Seminary! :D
2nd Hour: Troylairs! :D
3rd Hour: AlgebraII B!
4th Hour: Nutrition and Foods! YUM!
5th Hour: Biology A! (Mrs. Gilbert is SO nice)
(this is the rest of the week below this point)
1st Hour: I have to admit, it's the first class, so I'm usually really tired, BUT since this week I've had "Mr. RHS" I've gotten used to waking up early. Little did I know, I would have Brother Harward as my teacher. I thought we would have the same teachers as before, but nope! Brother Harward is so funny, and he's a lot of fun to have for a teacher.
2nd Hour: Ha, I've always loved to have Burrows in an early class, and this is still relatively early I guess. We haven't warmed up at ALL this week, and it's kind of grating, but understandable seeing as we have our Salt Lake trip this Friday.
3rd Hour: I have to admit again, that I'd never met Mr. Perry until that day. He seems really nice, and his work isn't really that hard for me, thank goodness.
4th Hour: Nutrition and Foods, oh my goodness. I'm learning so much about food, it's ridiculous. Today (Thursday), we made some Quick Mix, which we'll use tomorrow to make cookies, EXCEPT I won't be there, because of Choir.
5th Hour: I got all my supplies and stuff, and I'm actually learning a few things already about Biology that I didn't previously understand.
Song-Of-The-Day: Titanium (ft. Sia) by David Guetta.
Monday: I got my new schedule for Second Trimester and I have to admit I like it.
1st Hour: Seminary! :D
2nd Hour: Troylairs! :D
3rd Hour: AlgebraII B!
4th Hour: Nutrition and Foods! YUM!
5th Hour: Biology A! (Mrs. Gilbert is SO nice)
(this is the rest of the week below this point)
1st Hour: I have to admit, it's the first class, so I'm usually really tired, BUT since this week I've had "Mr. RHS" I've gotten used to waking up early. Little did I know, I would have Brother Harward as my teacher. I thought we would have the same teachers as before, but nope! Brother Harward is so funny, and he's a lot of fun to have for a teacher.
2nd Hour: Ha, I've always loved to have Burrows in an early class, and this is still relatively early I guess. We haven't warmed up at ALL this week, and it's kind of grating, but understandable seeing as we have our Salt Lake trip this Friday.
3rd Hour: I have to admit again, that I'd never met Mr. Perry until that day. He seems really nice, and his work isn't really that hard for me, thank goodness.
4th Hour: Nutrition and Foods, oh my goodness. I'm learning so much about food, it's ridiculous. Today (Thursday), we made some Quick Mix, which we'll use tomorrow to make cookies, EXCEPT I won't be there, because of Choir.
5th Hour: I got all my supplies and stuff, and I'm actually learning a few things already about Biology that I didn't previously understand.
Song-Of-The-Day: Titanium (ft. Sia) by David Guetta.
Sunday, December 2, 2012
And With Every Step We Make, I Die A Little More
Golly gee. Today has gone from being really emotional, to me just feeling down in the dumps. I understand that sometimes people don't want to hear about the way life is, or how horrible our world is now. But, it freaking sucks for you, because the world isn't getting any better and you need to realize it now. People will always be stupid, and people will always be judgmental and not give any bit of caring for what you have to say. You have to search for those people in your life who, even on the darkest of days, will stand up strong and tell you you're beautiful, that they love you, and that they don't care what people say about them. That they'll always strive to be a beacon of light, unto those that need a friend, unto those that need to be lifted out of the darkness they currently reside in.
There's only one thing that I can feasibly imagine is giving me strength to put this on, and that's the Holy Ghost. As much as I try not to post religious stuff anywhere on the internet, I just felt like today had to be an exception to that.
As some of you may already know, my sister is leaving in less than 3 weeks to go on her mission. I'm so proud to have her in my life. I'm going to miss her immensely. But I know she'll do such a good job out there in El Salvador, Santa Ana/Belize. She's been at college for the past three years of my life, and even though I haven't seen her very much in that time, me and her are still very close. She's the only sister I ever talk to. And she's one of the most important people in my life. Me and her always piss one another off, and sure, I joke around with her about a lot of things, but I love her all the same.
Yeah, I think one thing that sparked this, is getting shut down. Yeah, but whatever. I'm used to the rejection by now, I guess. Yeah, I can be depressing at times. I think I can be a bit of a good fake, sometimes.
I put on a big smile, and most everyone believes me when I say I'm completely okay. Only those that truly understand me have been able to see through my rouge and help me have a sincerely happy view on life and everything good about it. One of those people, is the love of my life, Rebekah Phillips. No matter how thick I try to hide my sadness over our breakup, even to this day, she can still tell something is wrong every time and just blatantly tell me to tell her what's wrong. I can't help it. As soon as she tells me to tell her, I cry. No one ever sees it, and almost no one ever knows about it. But I figure for those of you who actually read these and care about what I have to say would want to know more about me. Every night, no matter how good of a day I have, I'll cry. I'll wake up with red, sore eyes, and that's why I rub my eyes in 1st Hour everyday. Everyone's just like, "Oh, you're probably really tired." And then I'll say with a blank expression, "Yeah, you could say that!".
Besides that... today was just weird. I've felt the spirit more than usual today, and that's probably because of all the wonderful testimonies I got to hear today at church.
So yeah, this all came from being shut down. That goes to show you, that one person can influence your decisions.
Song-of-The-Post: Kyoto by Skrillex - I have no idea why this happened to be my song for now. I like the censored version I found on YouTube! I think I just like the dub step. (:
Shout-Out-Of-The-Post: Brianna Lee Mobley: You're epic, Brianna. Let's catch up shall we? We both sing, and you always ask me for a cover. (: I'm working on your cover, darling. Just you wait, it's coming up soon.
As a great comedian once said, "Bless your face. If you sneezed while watching this, bless you. PEACE OFF." Thanks, Tobuscus. SO, PEACE OFF!
There's only one thing that I can feasibly imagine is giving me strength to put this on, and that's the Holy Ghost. As much as I try not to post religious stuff anywhere on the internet, I just felt like today had to be an exception to that.
As some of you may already know, my sister is leaving in less than 3 weeks to go on her mission. I'm so proud to have her in my life. I'm going to miss her immensely. But I know she'll do such a good job out there in El Salvador, Santa Ana/Belize. She's been at college for the past three years of my life, and even though I haven't seen her very much in that time, me and her are still very close. She's the only sister I ever talk to. And she's one of the most important people in my life. Me and her always piss one another off, and sure, I joke around with her about a lot of things, but I love her all the same.
Yeah, I think one thing that sparked this, is getting shut down. Yeah, but whatever. I'm used to the rejection by now, I guess. Yeah, I can be depressing at times. I think I can be a bit of a good fake, sometimes.
I put on a big smile, and most everyone believes me when I say I'm completely okay. Only those that truly understand me have been able to see through my rouge and help me have a sincerely happy view on life and everything good about it. One of those people, is the love of my life, Rebekah Phillips. No matter how thick I try to hide my sadness over our breakup, even to this day, she can still tell something is wrong every time and just blatantly tell me to tell her what's wrong. I can't help it. As soon as she tells me to tell her, I cry. No one ever sees it, and almost no one ever knows about it. But I figure for those of you who actually read these and care about what I have to say would want to know more about me. Every night, no matter how good of a day I have, I'll cry. I'll wake up with red, sore eyes, and that's why I rub my eyes in 1st Hour everyday. Everyone's just like, "Oh, you're probably really tired." And then I'll say with a blank expression, "Yeah, you could say that!".
Besides that... today was just weird. I've felt the spirit more than usual today, and that's probably because of all the wonderful testimonies I got to hear today at church.
So yeah, this all came from being shut down. That goes to show you, that one person can influence your decisions.
Song-of-The-Post: Kyoto by Skrillex - I have no idea why this happened to be my song for now. I like the censored version I found on YouTube! I think I just like the dub step. (:
Shout-Out-Of-The-Post: Brianna Lee Mobley: You're epic, Brianna. Let's catch up shall we? We both sing, and you always ask me for a cover. (: I'm working on your cover, darling. Just you wait, it's coming up soon.
As a great comedian once said, "Bless your face. If you sneezed while watching this, bless you. PEACE OFF." Thanks, Tobuscus. SO, PEACE OFF!
Get On My Level and Lift
Sorry for the long pause again, this week was finals week and I was stressing over the finals I had to take.
Monday: I went with my great friend Jade to the Stop N' Go here in town and got the generic version of a Hostess Fruit Pie.It was actually pretty good, and not that expensive either. After we got back, we reminisced about how we miss Kai, who now lives in Utah, and how we wish we could still jam out with the guy. Had a bit of a breakdown, in the middle of 4th and 5th hour, and yet no one even noticed it. I'm amazed that no one noticed the shivering guy in the middle of class. But whatever, I can deal with that. I have Rebekah, and that's 1 out of 3 people I'll ever need in my life.
I also started playing Call of Duty: MW3 with my friend Gonzalo and he's really 'nice' to me when I start owning noobs with him, ha. These kids just need to get on my level, and lift.
Tuesday: Nothing different from Monday. I had another breakdown in the middle of 4th and 5th hour, but this time actually a couple of people saw it. They asked me if I was okay, and I said I wasn't.
Here's how the conversation went:
S: James, are you okay?
Me: No, I'm not, why?
S: I can tell, you're like shuddering and stuff.
M: Oh was I now? Umm, sorry, just a lot of things on my mind.
S: Well, do you want to talk about them?
M: Well, the only thing I feel at liberty to discuss, is this pain I feel everyday.
S: What's this pain?
M: Well, see, I'm in love with this girl, Rebekah Phillips, she's in the Junior High.
S: Oh, so it's a girl problem. I can understand that.
M: See, I really do love her, and... I miss her everyday.
B: James, how many times do I have to tell you that love doesn't exist at this age.
M: Bri, I've told you before, it can, and it does. Not once since our break-up have I deviated from loving her.
B: Well, I can see your point there. But how can you say it's love?
M: I know it is, because no one can make me as happy as she does.
B: What is it about her that you just can't let go?
S: Bri, maybe we shouldn't pester him so much.
B: No, I need to know this, otherwise I can't believe in him being in love.
M: Bri, to me, she's perfect and I can't stop thinking about her everyday. It's why I wear this necklace, because she said I could give it back to her when we get back together. It's my way of being able to be close to the girl I love the most without actually being with her.
B: That's so sweet, and I can actually say she's a lucky girl.
S: Wow James, I didn't know the story behind that washer on your necklace before.
Yeah, we're a crazy bunch and I love 'em. These guys know they can talk to me whenever they have a hard day or whatever. (:
Wednesday: Finals!!! Oh man, I had to get up early today and go to Mr. RHS sign-ups. I'm stoked and nervous about this, because I don't know what to do for my supposed talent. It's supposed to be a little funny, I guess? I'm thinking dance Gangnam Style or maybe I'll just play my new strange medley of It Will Rain, Someone Like You, and Secrets. Ha, I don't know. I have to be to practice every day next week, and I'm nervous.
Thursday: Don't have to be at school! :D I still came a little later so I could turn in the stuff for my Fundraiser.
Took me like... half an hour to get to there, but yeah. Ha, I four-wheeled to the school too, and I was scared about running out of gas! I got to the High School alright, and I got to sit next to Randi H! She's so amazing, and I got to show her my new 'medley' of sorts. It still needs a little work, but it's getting better. I'm leaning more towards using that instead of dancing for Mr. RHS.
Friday: No school for anyone in Rigby today. (: OH MAN, today was good!! Stayed home, played some CoD with Gonzalo, Cubzy, and Devon. Ha, we can be some righteous idiots sometimes. Just sitting there, telling the immature children who yell at us, to "Get on my level, kid." and "Do you even lift?". Ha, that's the reason I've started saying those phrases. Just making people rage all day.
Saturday: Ha, nothing much different, besides talking to Destaney on the phone about life and stuff, and me having a man to man talk with my dad about his dislike for Rebekah. I'm seriously done with the side comments that they think I don't notice. I do notice them, and it makes me feel sad/mad/empty inside. They can't support the thought of her, sometimes. I'm just done, so I'm planning to talk with both of them tomorrow, when we're all together at home.
Sunday: Lessons today were about Humility and Becoming Humble. I thought they were great, and they really brought me up! It's great to have Testimony meeting after such a long week of finals and stress.
I'm looking forward to The Walking Dead tonight at 7. It's one of my favorite shows, mainly for the story and for the zombies. I don't know what it is about zombies, but they get me all energized and sitting on the edge of my seat. I'll be having that talk soon with my parents. Oh man, I'm nervous, but I'm doing it. I have to do it, otherwise Rebekah will stay uncomfortable and I'm not having that if I can help it.
I love her, and I'm doing this mainly for her well-being, and also to stand up to my parents for myself. I'm tired of it all, and they need to know that she's a great person, and that I don't have this 'puppy love', as my dad calls it. I'm actually in love with her, and I'm going to stay faithful to that standard as long as I need to.
Song of the Day: The Fighter - Feat. Ryan Tedder (of One Republic) by Gym Class Heroes. For some reason, I kept hitting the replay button. I'm not sure how to explain it, but I really like this song.
Shout-Outs of the Day:
Rebekah Phillips: I love you, beautiful. I hope you're having a wonderful day, and I'm going to record the talk I have with my parents so you can actually hear what we say word-for-word. I'll try to get their verbal apologies, okay? Just know that I will always love you, and that you can always talk to me. I'm not just some guy who's leading you on. I truly do want everything for you, and you mean the world to me. "Where you go, I go. What you see, I see."
Angel Johnson: Ha, you're like one of my girl-best friends. I can always call you and talk to you about stuff, and I'm grateful for that. I'm looking forward to the 29th! STAKE DANCE! WOOO. Ha, anyways. Miss seeing you, and so does Des! Talk to her more often. (:
AS ALWAYS, HAVE A NICE DAY!
Monday: I went with my great friend Jade to the Stop N' Go here in town and got the generic version of a Hostess Fruit Pie.It was actually pretty good, and not that expensive either. After we got back, we reminisced about how we miss Kai, who now lives in Utah, and how we wish we could still jam out with the guy. Had a bit of a breakdown, in the middle of 4th and 5th hour, and yet no one even noticed it. I'm amazed that no one noticed the shivering guy in the middle of class. But whatever, I can deal with that. I have Rebekah, and that's 1 out of 3 people I'll ever need in my life.
I also started playing Call of Duty: MW3 with my friend Gonzalo and he's really 'nice' to me when I start owning noobs with him, ha. These kids just need to get on my level, and lift.
Tuesday: Nothing different from Monday. I had another breakdown in the middle of 4th and 5th hour, but this time actually a couple of people saw it. They asked me if I was okay, and I said I wasn't.
Here's how the conversation went:
S: James, are you okay?
Me: No, I'm not, why?
S: I can tell, you're like shuddering and stuff.
M: Oh was I now? Umm, sorry, just a lot of things on my mind.
S: Well, do you want to talk about them?
M: Well, the only thing I feel at liberty to discuss, is this pain I feel everyday.
S: What's this pain?
M: Well, see, I'm in love with this girl, Rebekah Phillips, she's in the Junior High.
S: Oh, so it's a girl problem. I can understand that.
M: See, I really do love her, and... I miss her everyday.
B: James, how many times do I have to tell you that love doesn't exist at this age.
M: Bri, I've told you before, it can, and it does. Not once since our break-up have I deviated from loving her.
B: Well, I can see your point there. But how can you say it's love?
M: I know it is, because no one can make me as happy as she does.
B: What is it about her that you just can't let go?
S: Bri, maybe we shouldn't pester him so much.
B: No, I need to know this, otherwise I can't believe in him being in love.
M: Bri, to me, she's perfect and I can't stop thinking about her everyday. It's why I wear this necklace, because she said I could give it back to her when we get back together. It's my way of being able to be close to the girl I love the most without actually being with her.
B: That's so sweet, and I can actually say she's a lucky girl.
S: Wow James, I didn't know the story behind that washer on your necklace before.
Yeah, we're a crazy bunch and I love 'em. These guys know they can talk to me whenever they have a hard day or whatever. (:
Wednesday: Finals!!! Oh man, I had to get up early today and go to Mr. RHS sign-ups. I'm stoked and nervous about this, because I don't know what to do for my supposed talent. It's supposed to be a little funny, I guess? I'm thinking dance Gangnam Style or maybe I'll just play my new strange medley of It Will Rain, Someone Like You, and Secrets. Ha, I don't know. I have to be to practice every day next week, and I'm nervous.
Thursday: Don't have to be at school! :D I still came a little later so I could turn in the stuff for my Fundraiser.
Took me like... half an hour to get to there, but yeah. Ha, I four-wheeled to the school too, and I was scared about running out of gas! I got to the High School alright, and I got to sit next to Randi H! She's so amazing, and I got to show her my new 'medley' of sorts. It still needs a little work, but it's getting better. I'm leaning more towards using that instead of dancing for Mr. RHS.
Friday: No school for anyone in Rigby today. (: OH MAN, today was good!! Stayed home, played some CoD with Gonzalo, Cubzy, and Devon. Ha, we can be some righteous idiots sometimes. Just sitting there, telling the immature children who yell at us, to "Get on my level, kid." and "Do you even lift?". Ha, that's the reason I've started saying those phrases. Just making people rage all day.
Saturday: Ha, nothing much different, besides talking to Destaney on the phone about life and stuff, and me having a man to man talk with my dad about his dislike for Rebekah. I'm seriously done with the side comments that they think I don't notice. I do notice them, and it makes me feel sad/mad/empty inside. They can't support the thought of her, sometimes. I'm just done, so I'm planning to talk with both of them tomorrow, when we're all together at home.
Sunday: Lessons today were about Humility and Becoming Humble. I thought they were great, and they really brought me up! It's great to have Testimony meeting after such a long week of finals and stress.
I'm looking forward to The Walking Dead tonight at 7. It's one of my favorite shows, mainly for the story and for the zombies. I don't know what it is about zombies, but they get me all energized and sitting on the edge of my seat. I'll be having that talk soon with my parents. Oh man, I'm nervous, but I'm doing it. I have to do it, otherwise Rebekah will stay uncomfortable and I'm not having that if I can help it.
I love her, and I'm doing this mainly for her well-being, and also to stand up to my parents for myself. I'm tired of it all, and they need to know that she's a great person, and that I don't have this 'puppy love', as my dad calls it. I'm actually in love with her, and I'm going to stay faithful to that standard as long as I need to.
Song of the Day: The Fighter - Feat. Ryan Tedder (of One Republic) by Gym Class Heroes. For some reason, I kept hitting the replay button. I'm not sure how to explain it, but I really like this song.
Shout-Outs of the Day:
Rebekah Phillips: I love you, beautiful. I hope you're having a wonderful day, and I'm going to record the talk I have with my parents so you can actually hear what we say word-for-word. I'll try to get their verbal apologies, okay? Just know that I will always love you, and that you can always talk to me. I'm not just some guy who's leading you on. I truly do want everything for you, and you mean the world to me. "Where you go, I go. What you see, I see."
Angel Johnson: Ha, you're like one of my girl-best friends. I can always call you and talk to you about stuff, and I'm grateful for that. I'm looking forward to the 29th! STAKE DANCE! WOOO. Ha, anyways. Miss seeing you, and so does Des! Talk to her more often. (:
AS ALWAYS, HAVE A NICE DAY!
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